July 3, 2018: Relational Preparation

“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” - John 13:34–35 (ESV) 9 days. 9 days spent overseas with your teammates. 9 days spent abroad with some of your closest friends. 9 days on a mission trip with a sibling or mother or daughter. 9 days of living with a group of people, some of whom are still strangers to you. 9 days of being without the privacy of your own room. 9 days of choosing to love others before yourself. 9 days of constant togetherness. 9 days. One of the most prevalent commands in the New Testament is that of loving one another. In John 13:35, Jesus goes as far as to say that by loving one another, the world will know that we are His disciples. This makes the love that we should have for each other pretty significant. If we proclaim Christ by having genuine love for one another, what are we proclaiming when there is discord, disunity, drama, or entitlement? As we go into the last two days before our trip, I thought it would be appropriate for us to end our Preparation Series by talking about relationships. As a review of what we talked about at the Ladies’ Meeting, here is a helpful acrostic for what it means to be UNIFIED: Be Understanding Be Nice Be Intentional Be Forgiving Be Inclusive Be Encouraging Be Dedicated Conversely, we want to avoid any action or attitude that IMPEDES unity. Here is a list of things that can stir up conflict and division when pursuing unity in Christ:

Irritability Maladjustment Pride Emotions (when not properly handled or managed) Drama Exclusivity Sin We’ll have a lot of things working against us--jet lag, culture shock, tiredness, frustration, busyness, stress, and our own various personality traits--but none of these things truly excuse us from loving one another. After all, if loving each other was easy, we wouldn’t be told so often to do so. Instead, love is viewed as an intentional action, an intentional choice, and an intentional attitude towards others. So how do we love when things get hard? First, remember that you are no better than the person you are struggling to love. Your weaknesses may be different and your quirks, in your opinion, may be less detectable, but you are both sinners saved by grace. If God in His mercy has shown His grace to both of you, you have no reason to withhold that same grace from your brother or sister in Christ. Secondly, remember that people are watching. Jesus said that all people will know that we are His disciples if we love another, and people will know that there’s drama a-brewin’ if we’re being snappy and rude to each other. We can’t love the people we’re serving but show animosity towards the people we’re serving with and still say, “That’s a good gospel.” The gospel message is to be lived out individually in our personal lives, communally as we grow in Christ with other believers, and globally as we serve others like us who need the gospel message just as desperately. Two out of three ain’t bad, but two out of three ain’t biblical either. 1 John 4:20–21 says, If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen. And this commandment we have from him: whoever loves God must also love his brother. (ESV) Thirdly, If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. - Romans 12:18 (ESV). So if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. - Matthew 5:23–24 (ESV). If you’re struggling to love your teammate due to conflict, it should be handled prayerfully, mindfully, and quickly. Don’t let conflicts fester. Don’t get other team members involved. Don’t make it worse than what it is. We talked about tips for handling conflict at the Ladies’ Meeting, so use those. Didn’t make it to the meeting? I’ll upload a file that you can print out and take with you. Don’t let conflict cause disunity and dissension in the team or in the Body of Christ. Love covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8), so don’t let sin win.

I’m excited to be able to spend this time with you in the next few days. Here’s to new memories, new experiences, and new relationships.

See you Friday.